New River Community College shooting

Neil Allan MacInnis

Neil Allan MacInnis

Police: 2 women shot at Va. community college in stable condition; suspect held without bail:

Last week in Christianburg, Virginia there was a shooting at New River Community College where two women were injured. The suspect is 18-year-old Neil Allan MacInnis, a student of the college. MacInnis is said to have taken a shotgun to the section of shopping mall that was converted into the school. Witnesses say that MacInnis was using an old Bugs Bunny trick to try to lure more victims out into the open…

Keller said the shooter called out, “Help, help!” as he walked, apparently feigning to be a victim, then yelled, “It’s the police!’

But Keller said she and her friends didn’t take the bait.

“The guy’s a terrible actor,” Keller told The Roanoke Times. “I knew it was just a matter of holding still as long as possible until the real police got there.”

If you’re not familiar with the cartoon I’m referring to here it is. The gag I’m referring to starts at the 5:40 mark.

Trench, are you making light of a school shooting? Yes and no. I’m sure the people who were at the school were frightened beyond belief and two women were shot. I would never make fun of what they had to endure. However this MacInnis character seems like such a clueless putz.

For example he allegedly announced the shooting on 4chan minutes before it took place. For those of you unfamiliar with 4chan one of the definitions of it listed on Urban Dictionary is “An image board in which jaded and cynical internet users compete to see who can be the biggest asshole” while another one says “The source of all that is evil and wrong on the Internet.”

Here’s a screen capture of what MacInnis allegedly posted on 4chan…

Click for larger

Click for larger

Here’s the text

“My name is neil Macinnis and I go to new river community college in Christiansburg Virgina. 10 minutes away from Virginia tech. I’m gonna give y’all the details because the news never gets it right. Stevens 320 shotgun. Buck shots and slugs.”

“Wanna listen? If tha doesn’t work search New river valley public safety.”

I’m a bit nervous because I’ve never really handled a shotgun but a few times with the Christiansburg police. Anyways this is not a highscores game but actually a lesson (that’s why I’m at school). Wanna see my eportfolio/what I look like? Make sure there is a slash at end. Also pic related I’m here at school writing this. Wish me luck. An heroing is not necessary unless I get fucked out the ass. It’s pretty busy.”

For those of you not fluent in 4chan-speak ‘an heroing’ means to commit suicide.

So far most reports I’ve seen say that a motive has not yet been released but the motive seems pretty obvious to me. He’s an internet douchebag who wanted to be seen as cool and tough to all the other internet douchebags. Newsflash, he’s neither cool nor tough. As a matter of fact his genius crime spree was brought to a halt when he surrendered to a mall cop.

I hate to give this idiot even a second of his 15 minutes but I had to just to show how pathetic of a human he is.

UPDATE 4/22/2014: MacInnis has pleaded guilty to the shootings and is scheduled to be sentenced in July.

UPDATE 8/5/2014: MacInnis was sentenced to 68 years in prison, with 30 years suspended.

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  1. Veronica Dobell Prior

    Surrendered to a mall cop? Really? LMAO!

    1. Trench Reynolds

      If it wasn’t for the fact that he actually did hit two women this would be most laughable.


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