Dover, Delaware dumbfucks deny dropping daughter

James Schulz and Amber Caldwell

Police: Dover couple accused of repeatedly abusing baby:

(Oh hell, I already cursed. And dropping is an understatement but it worked with the alteration.)

Cletus and Brandine up there are 21-year-old James Schulz and 19-year-old Amber Caldwell. Up until about a week ago they had a 3-month-old daughter. They don’t have her anymore.

Police say that the pair of yokels took their daughter to the hospital with ‘injuries’. They claimed that the injuries were from ‘a fall’. Schulz allegedly said that the girl fell on to the concrete floor while he was upstairs. Where the hell were they living, a two-story garage?

You tell me if these are the injuries of a fall…

The baby had large contusions to her nose, forehead, both eyes, the right side of her face and to her left ear, according to court records.

Granted my medical knowledge is limited but I think a 3-month-old baby would need to fall about a hundred times for those injuries to be sustained. But as they say on TV, but wait, there’s more…

On the right side of the baby’s face, there appeared to be fingerprint marks on her cheek as if someone had squeezed her face, which was swollen, police said in court records.

Now my forensics knowledge is as limited as my medical knowledge but to me that sound like he palmed her head like a basketball and threw her. Let’s go to the professionals for a comment.

Doctors determined from the examination that the injuries were not consistent with the father’s story, police said.

They are however consistent with mine. Allegedly Schulz later admitted to police that he threw the baby because she wouldn’t stop crying. The baby landed on the bed then bounced off onto the concrete floor and continued to slide along the floor. Holy hell. I can’t even imagine the amount force that he must have used to inflict that kind of trauma. In my time I have been plenty angry before and have done some pretty stupid things like punching cars and walls and throwing inanimate objects so hard that they shatter but I don’t think that I could ever muster up that kind of anger and violence towards another human being yet someone so defenseless.

When the (thumbs through the BB Thesaurus of Nasty Words) Skank Anchor, or skanchor if you please, was interviewed by police she said that they have been having arguments about how he ‘handles the baby’. Listen bitch, if you have ONE argument about how he handles the baby and he doesn’t learn after that he’s not exactly at the deep end of the gene pool. Her ass is in jail too police say that she also took place in prior abuse.

Anyway back to Hilljack. What I think ‘they’ should do is get the biggest, meanest MMA fighter they can like Brock Lesnar and have the guy palm his fucking melon and repeatedly smash it against a concrete floor until he is sliding across it and his face becomes a gelatinous pulp.

Thanks to AJ for the tip.